selling homes. Chandler Realty
Vancouver Real Estate Agent BC - Realtor | Downtown Vancouver Condos for Sale maggie chandler vancouver realtor chandler realty Ltd. Real Estate Agent in Vancouver BC Maggie Chandler, the founder of Chandler Realty, has been working in the Vancouver real estate market since 1981. With over 22 years experience as a real estate agent, as well as expert skills in negotiation and marketing, she is a top producer for buying or selling homes. Chandler Realty specializes in apartments and condos in Downtown Vancouver's Coal Harbour and the West End as well as homes in Vancouver Westside, Kitsilano, and False Creek. To learn more about about Maggie's services visit: Real Estate Services (a new window will open) View Home and Condo MLS Listings Contact Maggie Or visit the links below for more information on: Vancouver's real estate market Tips for buying and selling your home Information on Vancouver's Kitsilano community Read the July edition of the Realty Times Personal Information Information Center Search For Property Vancouver Real Estate Agent My Testimonials My Commitment Real Estate Reports Vancouver Demographics Vancouver 5 Year Condo Price Graph Affiliate Partners Vancouver Average Price Graph Residential Listings Search MLS Investors Recreational Listings Agent Referrals Extended Search Buying Home Selling Home Kitsilano Neighbourhood Helpful Mortgage Tips For Buyer Find Your Dream Home Vancouver City Tours Buying and Selling Canadian Property Vancouver Home Buyer's Handbook TheRealEstateBook Marketing Advantage Helpful Tips For Seller Beat the Competition Tips for Selling Your Home Offer Guidelines for Sellers Moving Vancouver Neighborhoods Kitsilano History Arbutus Walk Solds Arbutus Walk Properties Kitsilano Community Coal Harbour Neighbourhood Coal Harbour Vancouver, BC Coal Harbour Property Listings Avila - 560 Cardero Street Carina - 1233 Cordova Street Harbourside Park - 555 Jervis Bauhinia - 535 Nicola Street Cielo - 1205 West Hastings Harbourside Park - 588 Broughton 1616 Bayshore Drive Classico - 1328 West Pender Palladio - 1228 West Hastings 1650 Bayshore Drive Denia - 499 Broughton Living Shangri-La - 1189 West Georgia 1680 Bayshore Drive Dockside - 1478 West Hastings Shaw Tower - 1077 West Cordova 1710 Bayshore Drive Escala - 323 Jervis Street The Melville - 1189 Melville 1790 Bayshore Drive Flatiron - 1277 Melville Street The Ritz - 1211 Melville Waterfront Place - 576 Nicola Home Downtown Real Estate Contact Vancouver real estate agent to help you buy / sell a home or condo in downtown Vancouver.
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Manage the moving and relocation process with Moving.com Find a Mover Truck Rental Moving Boxes and Supplies Moving Tools Advice & Articles Mortgage Rates & Quotes Mortgage Commentary Tools & Calculators Advice & Articles Find an Agent Apartment Rentals Roommate Search Home Purchasing Tools Articles & Advice Storage Facilities Truck Rental Packing Supplies Advice & Articles Site Map | Create an Account | Login I need help with: - Select Move Type - ----------------------- Full Service Self-Service Auto Transport International Office Piano Art & Antiques Labor Only Truck Rental I'm moving on Date : Jan Feb Mar April May June July Aug Sept Oct Nov Dec 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 2005 2006 I'm moving FROM : - Select a Country - ----------------------- United States Canada Afghanistan Albania Algeria Andorra Angola Argentina Armenia Australia Austria Azerbaidjan Bahamas Bahrain Bangladesh Barbados Belarus Belgium Belize Benin Bermuda Bolivia Bosnia-Herzegovina Botswana Brazil Bulgaria Burkina Faso Burundi Cambodia Cameroon Cayman Islands Central African Republic Chad Chile China Colombia Congo Costa Rica Croatia Cuba Cyprus Czech Republic Denmark Djibouti Dominican Republic East Timor Ecuador Egypt El Salvador Equatorial Guinea Eritrea Estonia Ethiopia Fiji Finland France Gabon Gambia Georgia Germany Ghana Greece Greenland Guadeloupe (French) Guam Guatemala Guinea Guinea Bissau Guyana Haiti Honduras Hong Kong Hungary Iceland India Indonesia Iran Iraq Ireland Israel Italy Ivory Coast Jamaica Japan Jordan Kazakhstan Kenya Kuwait Kyrgyzstan Laos Latvia Lebanon Lesotho Liberia Libya Liechtenstein Lithuania Luxembourg Macau Macedonia Madagascar Malawi Malaysia Maldives Mali Malta Martinique (French) Mauritania Mauritius Mexico Moldavia Monaco Mongolia Montserrat Morocco Mozambique Myanmar - 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Domania - Do Your Home Work Here -- Check Home Sale Prices - Find Your Home Value - Get House Values Online - Search Real Estate Listings | Domania Email: Password: Password: -- Home Resources » Home Price Check » Value Check » Mortgages » Home Improvement » Calculators » Property Tax Real Estate » For Sale Listings » Find a REALTOR » New Homes by iNest » Find a Builder by iNest » Find a Foreclosure Members » Log In » Register » My Domania » Edit My Account Learning Center » Real Estate Library » Using Domania » Expert Advice » Sitemap R.E. Agents » Partner with Us! Home Price Check Find out what it sold for... Address City, State OR ZIP Code Value Check Find out what it's worth... # Street Name City State AL AK AZ AR CA CO CT DE DC FL GA HI ID IL IN IA KS KY LA ME MD MA MI MN MS MO MT NE NV NH NJ NM NY NC ND OH OK OR PA RI SC SD TN TX UT VT VA WA WV WI WY ZIP Never Miss a Home Sale! Sign up for a Domania account and get full data access, saved searches, email alerts, advanced Home Price Check options and a whole lot more... all for FREE! Smart Loans Made Simple Find New Construction in Your Area Find brand new homes from the country's top home builders and earn up to 1% cash back. Please select a location... AZ- Phoenix AZ- Tucson CA- Sacramento CO- Colorado Springs CO- Denver CO- Fort Collins DC- Washington D.C. FL- Jacksonville FL- Orlando FL- Sarasota FL- Southeast FL-Southwest FL- Tampa GA- Atlanta IL- Chicago IN- Fort Wayne IN- Indianapolis IN- Lafayette MA- Boston MD- Baltimore MI- Detroit MI- Grand Rapids MN- Minneapolis NV- Las Vegas NC- Charlotte NC- Greensboro NC- Raleigh-Durham OH- Cincinanati OH- Cleveland OH- Columbus OH- Dayton PA- Pittsburgh SC- Charlotte SC- Greenville-Spartanburg TX- Austin TX- Dallas TX- Houston TX- San Antonio UT- Salt Lake City VA- Richmond WI- Madison WI- Milwaukee If you don't see your area listed click here . Company Information | Contact Us | Privacy | Security | Terms of Use | Licenses & Disclosures We are pledged to the letter and spirit of U.S. policy for the achievement of equal housing opportunity throughout the Nation. We encourage and support an affirmative advertising and marketing program in which there are no barriers to obtaining housing because of race, color, religion, sex, handicap, familial status, or national origin. LendingTree technology and processes are patented under US Patent Nos. 6,385,594 and 6,611,816. © 1998 - 2005 Domania.com, a service of LendingTree, LLC. All Rights Reserved. This site is directed at, and made available to, persons in the continental U.S., Alaska and Hawaii only. Find Houses for Sale or REALTORS ® at Real Estate .com REALTOR ® - A registered collective membership mark that identifies a real estate professional who is a member of the National Association of REALTORS® and subscribes to its strict Code of Ethics.
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Sarasota Real Estate-Siesta Key Real Estate-Sarasota Homes and Condos Florida Sarasota Real Estate Siesta Key Real Estate Siesta Key Condos for Sale Florida Real Estate Sarasota Realtor MLS Sarasota Real Estate Searching for Sarasota Florida real estate? You've come to the right place! Luxury Homes and Condos on Siesta Key , Longboat Key , Casey Key , St. Armands , Lido Key - all Florida real estate needs including buying, selling, information, free MLS listings available on this site. Search like a realtor with no sign up unless you want more info! T ravel and home magazines describe Florida as a tropical paradise, and financial and investment publications feature lengthy articles about real estate and its rich economic vitality -- the height in luxury living! See why Money Magazine named Sarasota as one of the Best Places to Live . July 2005: Sarasota is experiencing a strong real estate market and soaring prices. A recent article in the H erald-Tribune refers to " the rising price of 'white gold'". The scarcity of premium beachfront land -- sand is the white gold of the real estate market -- is what drives the value . . . It's the land values and the scarcity that are driving this market. Prices are going out of sight! Real estate developers and realtors in Sarasota alike believe it won't be long before prices in Sarasota are as high as Naples and Boca Raton. Real estate listings referred to in the article sited waterfront luxury properties in Sarasota ranging from $5.4 million to rapidly approaching $20 million. Investors are flocking to Sarasota to view listings, buy condos and luxury waterfront property with views of Sarasota Bay and the Gulf of Mexico. Golfers want to retire here. Baby boomers are picking out properties before retirement -- Sarasota is hot, hot, hot!!! Neighborhood Update Sarasota's neighborhoods are tropical in nature and offer an outstanding Florida lifestyle. Some popular neighborhoods to check out: Forest Lakes and the Lakes Estates. Real estate owners in mainland Sarasota , appreciate what an extraordinary place Sarasota Florida is. A vital community, each facet of of our tropical city is just as exciting as the next. Special - Sarasota Lot for Sale - Waterfront on Phillippi Creek $695,000 Bubble Update P rices in Sarasota have increased considerably in the last few years but keep in mind, Florida prices are a bargain when compared to other areas such as Naples, San Diego, Boston and Washington, DC. For a chunk of white gold, give us a call today! Please enjoy our website and see why Sarasota is the best place to live in Florida! And good news for buyers, prices seem to be stabilizing with lots of new and resale homes on the market in October just in time for the 2006 season. Also news you should know - in October, the National Association of Realtor Research Group released studies of 130 U.S. cities including Sarasota-Bradenton-Venice market, to refute media claims that a housing bubble exists. Annette Smith REALTOR , e-PRO RE/MAX Properties 2000 Webber Street Sarasota, FL 34239 941.308.3814 941.954.5455 annette@annettesellssarasota.com www.AnnetteSellsSarasota.com Home Page Sarasota Real Estate and MLS Search Featured Homes for Sale Sarasota Prices About Sarasota Florida About Siesta Key-Florida About Other Florida Communities Home Buyer and Home Seller Resources Sarasota Community Information & Real Estate Resources Blog About Annette Contact Annette Sarasota Statistics November 2005: Looks like Sarasota prices are leveling off and a buyer's market could be just around the corner! Read More-Real Estate Prices in Sarasota! The crown jewels of Sarasota neighborhoods will always be its barrier islands of Siesta Key , Longboat Key , Casey Key , St. Armands , Bird Key , and Lido Key . With world-class championship golf courses , gourmet restaurants, quaint antique stores, live theater , sport fishing, boating, tennis, performing arts, beach walking, galleries, fine dining, collecting seashells and watching spectacular sunsets on the Gulf of Mexico or buying real estate. . . Sarasota has it all! Read an extensive list of Sarasota's accolades. Beaches, boating, golf, dining, shopping, theater -- there's always something exciting going on in Sarasota. Sophisticated or casual, upscale or economical activities and real estate, it's all just minutes away. Each area of Sarasota County has its own personality, and our visitors are delighted to find more vacation variety here than they ever expected. The City of Sarasota is home to gourmet restaurants and chic shops featuring the best items from around the world. Once known primarily as a vacation or retirement destination, today's Sarasota is home to diversity from mansions, distinctive waterfront properties, private waterfront estates to old Florida cottage charm. A great year-round climate, expanding employment opportunities, abundant leisure time activities and excellent schools attract creative entrepreneurs, real estate investors, skilled workers and professionals who want to thrive in a community where life is sun and fun. Almost half of Sarasota County's population is in the prime working age range of 25 to 64. No matter what your age or stage, there's always something interesting to do. Free Sarasota Information . Sarasota Condos - Information Come visit Sarasota and give Annette a call for a list of Sarasota homes for sale in the MLS and other Sarasota real estate information. Map Your Sarasota Florida Trip , view Find Siesta Key-City Data . For best gas prices in Sarasota, check out GasBuddy.com. - Send us an email: annette@annettesellssarasota.com if you have a question. The MLS Search for Florida Homes Sarasota Golf Communities For the golfer, Sarasota offers spectacular golf course homes in the communities of Lakewood Ranch, Prestancia, the Concession and Forest Lakes. Browse our Sarasota Golf Communities for the ultimate in golf course living and find the informationon all the courses on - Sarasota Golf Info! New! Downtown Sarasota Condos! Downtown Living! Water front Real Estate in Sarasota Our investment property professionals are available to assist you in the sales of ocean front condos,beachfront vacation condos, and luxury beach houses - in the most desirable locations and best neighborhoods throughout Sarasota, Siesta Key, Casey Key, Lido Key, St. Armands and Longboat Key. We specialize in finding you the perfect vacation home, whether it be as a private year round residence, or as rental investment property. The Sarasota real estate market and ocean front real estate sales are soaring, and we offer unique guidance in the purchase or sale of beach resort property. Spend some time with us on our website and our new blog and let us show you what the Sarasota lifestyle is all about. If you are just discovering our city, take a photo tour and then send us an email or give us a call for more information! e-mail Annette Smith, your Sarasota Realtor Sarasota Real Estate Sarasota homes Sarasota accolades Sarasota condos Sarasota downtown condos Sarasota Golf Course Homes Sarasota real estate values Choosing a Sarasota Realtor Sarasota new homes info Sarasota home buying tips Sarasota home selling tips Sarasota luxury homes for sale Sarasota luxury real estate Hot Neighborhood Sales Neighborhood Descriptions Sarasota Lifestyle Real estate related sites Sarasota real estate agents Sarasota preconstruction ___________ Siesta Key real estate Siesta Key waterfront condos Siesta Key Chamber of Commerce _________________ Longboat Key real estate Longboat Key waterfront condos Longboat Key Chamber of Commerce Lido Key real estate Lido Key waterfront condos _________________ Bird Key real estate Casey Key real estate Casey Key waterfront homes St. Armands real estate Sarasota featured homes Sarasota schools Sarasota Chamber of Commerce Realtors in other states Sarasota tour ________________ RE/MAX Properties C ommunity information links Selling for top dollar Your Quick Guide to Sarasota real estate ! Real Estate News Articles Preconstruction Real Estate Investments - Buy Now, Pay Later Waterfront Property - Four Hurricanes Haven't Slowed Sarasota Real Estate Sales Sarasota Condos -Waterfront Luxury Homes for the Stars Sarasota Hot Neighborhoods For the boater or just a water lover, Sarasota offers spectacular waterfront homes in the communities of Golden Gate Point . If water is not the priority, Forest Lakes Country Club has new zoning plans for the golf course, new condos and single-family homes in the forecast for this Sarasota gem. The Sarasota Board of Commissioners unanimously approved the project, and demolition of the existing Club House facility could begin as early as the second week of December 2005. For the best West of the Trail location, check out the area close to Morton's Gourmet Market. Another charming neighborhood is The Lakes Estates . Real Estate Relocation and Referral Resources Learn about this Relocation and Referral Network Real Estate Roster -- End Code -- "Web-Savvy" Relocation Realtors Relocating to another area? Please contact one of the real estate agents listed below to assist you with realty, relocation, MLS (multiple listing service), and city information in any of these areas. Or, we'll make the introductions for you as our relocation network is global. Please contact us regarding real estate professionals in another country, state or city . 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Sarasota Real Estate is featured in Agent-Pro Real Estate Directory Homes For Sale Listings Homes for sale listings, including multiple listing services (MLS), for sale by owner (FSBO), foreclosed houses and new homes Awarded Top 10% in the Nation for Consumer Satisfaction by the Internet Consumer Group Directory Real Estate - Meta-Directory for Real Estate Real Estate Link World Web www.annettesellssarasota.com Your online source for real estate, real estate agents, and homes for sale in Sarasota communities! Investment Real Estate Information in this site about Sarasota property for sale is collected from various resources and deemed to be reliable but not guaranteed. This site contains MLS real estate listings and resources on Siesta Key homes, mainland real estate in Sarasota , St. Armands, Bird Key , Casey Key luxury property, Lido Key, and Longboat Key Florida . Search the MLS in this site for information about Sarasota homes for sale, Buyer Tips and seller tips , mortgage info and other resources available also. AnnetteSellsSarasota.com offers a wide range of residential properties for sale. Annette and her network of realtors want to be your Sarasota Realtors and your online resource for information about homes listed in Sarasota, Florida -offering you housing info in our relocation website and a search of properties in the multiple listing service (mls listings). This comprehensive site offers direct MLS access to the latest properties for sale, homes, condos, condominiums, investment properties, Gulf Front, waterfront, beach properties, golf course communities in Sarasota, FL including community information, consumer resources, school information , free reports, answers to commonly asked real estate questions. Site updated daily. Our goal as your Sarasota Realtor is to help you be an informed home buyer or home seller in today's changing real estate market. When looking for homes for sale or if you need to sell a house, selecting your Realtor is an important decision. You will benefit from Annette and her relocation network of realtors combined real estate experience. When the time is right to buy or sell, call or e-mail Annette for a smooth transaction or a sophisticated internet marketing presentation to get your house listed in the MLS immediately. Call Annette Smith, your Sarasota connection, for all your Sarasota Florida real estate needs. We can refer you to a Naples Florida real estate agent if Naples is your dream. South Florida Realtors are in our network of partners as Naples is only 90 miles south on I-75- give us a call for a referral. Google | Yahoo | Altavista | MSN | AOL | Lycos | Ask Jeeves | Excite | Netscape | All The Web
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Amazon.com: House of the Dead: DVD Your Store DVD See All 32 Product Categories Your Account | Cart | Wish List | Help | Advanced Search | Browse Genres | Top Sellers | New & Future Releases | Television Central | Life & Learning | DVD Essentials | Blowout DVDs | Movie Showtimes | Used DVDs Search Amazon.com DVD Web Search Join Amazon Prime and ship Two-Day for free and Overnight for $3.99. Already a member? Sign in . DVD Information Explore this item buying info editorial reviews customer reviews cast and crew fun facts Listmania! The worst Modern Horror Films : A list by Jason Voorhees "Jason V" Add your List Ready to buy? Sign in to turn on 1-Click ordering. A9.com users save 1.57% on Amazon. Learn how . MORE BUYING CHOICES 183 used & new from $0.70 Have one to sell? House of the Dead (2003) Starring: Jonathan Cherry , Tyron Leitso Director: Uwe Boll Rating: See larger image Share your own customer images List Price: $18.00 Price: $15.99 & eligible for FREE Super Saver Shipping on orders over $25. See details You Save: $2.01 (11%) Availability: Usually ships within 24 hours. Ships from and sold by Amazon.com. Want it delivered Friday, December 30? Choose One-Day Shipping at checkout. See details 183 used & new available from $0.70 Edition: Other Versions and Languages Other Versions (VHS Tape) List Price Price Other Offers: VHS Tape House of Dead (2003) (Spanish) (Sub) $44.98 $42.73 VHS Tape House of Dead (2003) $9.98 $9.48 34 used & new from $0.45 Better Together Buy this DVD with Alone in the Dark DVD ~ Christian Slater today! Total List Price: $37.98 Buy Together Today: $33.98 Customers who bought this DVD also bought Alone in the Dark DVD ~ Christian Slater Boogeyman (Special Edition) DVD ~ Barry Watson Saw (Widescreen Edition) DVD ~ Leigh Whannell The Texas Chainsaw Massacre DVD ~ Jessica Biel Explore Similar Items : in DVD , in Books Storyline Genres: Horror , Thriller , Action , Mystery Tagline: The dead walk...You run Plot Outline: A group of teens arrive on an island for a rave--only to discover the island has been taken over by zombies. The group takes refuge in a house where they try to survive the night. Plot Synopsis: This film is a prequel to all of the The House of the Dead video games. Set on an island off the coast of Florida, a techno rave party attracts a diverse group of college coeds and a Coast Guard officer. Soon, they discover that their X-laced escapades are to be interrupted by zombies and monsters that attack them on the ground, from the air, and in the sea, ruled by an evil entity in the House of the Dead... Plot Keywords: Cleavage | Spin Off From Video Game | Gun | Zombie | Based On Video Game | Island | Florida Keys | Martial Arts | Nudity | Decapitation | Gore | Severed Head | (Show all 68 plot keywords recommended by customers) Product Details Actors: Jonathan Cherry , Tyron Leitso , Clint Howard , Ona Grauer , Ellie Cornell , See more Directors: Uwe Boll Format: Closed-captioned, Color, Dolby, Dts stereo, Widescreen, Ntsc, Widescreen Anamorphic Region: Region 1 ( U.S. and Canada only. Read more about DVD formats. ) Aspect Ratio: 1.85:1 Rated: (Not for sale to persons under age 18.) Studio: Live / Artisan DVD Release Date: January 27, 2004 Run Time: 90 min (original theatrical or airing runtime) Average Customer Review: Based on 287 Reviews DVD Features: Available Subtitles: English, Spanish Available Audio Tracks: English (DTS 6.1 ES), English (Dolby Digital 5.1 EX), English (Dolby Digital 2.0 Stereo) Commentary by: director Uwe Boll, post-production supervisor Jonathan Shore, producer Shawn Williamson, and actor Jonathan Cherry (Unknown Format) Commentary by: executive producer Mark Altman (Unknown Format) Deleted scenes "Behind the House: Anatomy of the Zombie Movement" making-of featurette "Stacked for Zom-Bat: The Sexy Babes of House of the Dead Prepare for Battle!" Sneak peek of new Sega game Nightshade From IMDb: Quotes & Trivia ASIN: B0000YEE6C Amazon.com Sales Rank: #12,784 in DVD Theatrical Release Information US Theatrical Release Date: October 10, 2003 MPAA: for pervasive strong violence/gore, language and some nudity. Production Company: Boll Kino Beteiligungs GmbH & Co. KG, Brightlight Pictures Inc., Herold and Besser Studios, Mindfire Entertainment USA Box Office: $10 Million Budget Estimate: $7 Million Filming Locations: Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada Editorial Reviews Amazon.com The usual slasher-movie teens charter a boat to attend a rave in Washington's San Juan islands, find zombies there, and splatter their guts all over the place. House of the Dead shows early promise when the boat captain is the dude from Das Boot (Jürgen Prochnow) and the mate is the inimitably weird Clint Howard. Alas, things devolve from there. The movie includes frequent flashes from its video game inspiration, not that we need much reminding of the obvious source. Amongst the rotten dialogue, bad acting, and gratuitous topless scenes, there's one looooong shootout sequence in the middle of the picture that should be the main attraction for fans of this kind of thing. Otherwise, it's at the level of every other slasher movie, video game or no video game, in which stupid people do stupid things to keep themselves in harm's way. --Robert Horton Customers who viewed this DVD also viewed Dawn of the Dead (Widescreen Unrated Director's Cut) DVD ~ Boyd Banks Elektra (Widescreen Edition) DVD ~ Jennifer Garner Land of the Dead (Unrated Edition) DVD ~ Simon Baker Blade - Trinity (Unrated Widescreen Edition) (New Line Platinum Series) DVD ~ Wesley Snipes Explore Similar Items : in DVD , in Computer & Video Games Spotlight Reviews Write an online review and share your thoughts with other customers. 47 of 50 people found the following review helpful: Lord have mercy! , March 30, 2004 Reviewer: Shawn Watson "God of Gods" (Badger's Brook, Scotland) - See all my reviews There are people out there who will greenlight anything! That is the only explanation I can offer as to why the House of the Dead movie exists. And that's only scary part to the whole movie. It's so bad you'll go off movies forever. I seriously wanted to switch this off and turn the TV over to the Paint Drying channel but I was bound by my word to suffer the whole thing. I don't know why I do these bad things to myself. As if it matters, here's the basic jist of the 'story'. A group of twenty-somethings are so desperate to go out to some island in the Pacific Northwest (Canada actually, because it's cheap) for the 'Rave of the Century' (which consists of about 8 people and un-raving music) that they pay some craggy old fisherman $1000 to take them there after they miss the main ferry. That's gotta be some rave to be worth all that dough! The fisherman warns them that the island is also known as the Island of the Dead (hang on-I thought this was HOUSE of the Dead?) and that they are all doomed yadda yadda yadda. First faults here. Why would a tiny little rave (of the Century my foot!) be held on some remote island? Why would anyone willingly pay loads of money to get it? Why pay even more to the craggy old fisherman to take them back when they could just come back with the others? Once they arrive they discover that the rave (which consists of about 2 tents, a small stage and a port-a-john) has been smashed, there's blood everywhere and no one is around. What would any rationally thinking person do? Run for their lives of course. But no, these clueless, obviously blind people decide to go look for them. Soon enough they discover an old ramshackle house that's 50 times as big on the inside as it is on the outside. Another half hour of stumbling around in the forest follows, as an excuse to kill of some of the lesser characters, and after much tedium they arrive back at the house again. The characters, like the movie, go nowhere. Jammed into this ghastly disaster is a superabundance of gibberish dialogue, heinous acting, mumbo-jumbo exposition and zillions of clips from the once-popular arcade game of the same name. Why this was universally accepted as a good idea with the filmmakers I'll never know. The clips have no reference to any of the scenes and only degrade this trash even further, if that is at all possible. It has nothing to do with the game save for some cheap, throwaway line at the end. It makes Resident Evil look like cinematic glory. Hell, even the Double Dragon movie seems multi-Oscar worthy in comparison to this junk. The only one who comes out of this with his dignity still intact is Jurgen Prochnow. He could have just taken his money and ran but he tries his best with the awful script and brings a tiny bit of pathos to his character. The rest of the cast suck I'm afraid. The characters are idiots and deserve to die. Plus, if you cut out the swearing and pointless nudity, I see no reason why this film cannot be shown on Saturday morning TV. It's not frightening in the slightest. Pirates of the Caribbean is more scary than the skeletal bad guys in this film. And where did all those bad guys come from anyway? There were only a few people on the island to begin with. I guess this justifies the reason they chose to reuse footage over and over. I kid you not, you'll see the same zombie die a dozen times. Who's ultimately to blame for that scandalous waste of celluloid? None other than director Uwe Boll. His control over the movie is non-existent. You can clearly the see actors have no idea what they should be doing and that the zombies aren't really taking it all seriously. The actors seem like they're reading off cue cards as they constantly pause in the middle of long sentences and carry on talking as soon as they see the next card. It all feels very unnatural. Plus the film is shot like a two-part mini-series. I have indeed seen better TV productions. And don't get me started on the editing. The film is an incoherent babble with thousands upon thousands of pointless shots and dozens of meaningless camera pans. No real skill or talent was put into making this at all. It truly baffles and boggles the mind how movies this unfathomably bad can get made and George A. Romero can't even get anyone to take his calls. House of the Dead makes some idiotic reference to Romero in a lazy attempt to be 'post-modern' but it only irritates that they think THIS is in the same league as a REAL zombie movie. For what it's worth, the 1.85:1 anamorphic picture looks great and the Dolby 5.1 soundtrack is clean but very unimpressive and only serves to pronounce the heavily over-used ADR even more. The DVD comes with extras but why torture yourself. Isn't this review warning enough? Stay away! You are all doomed I tell you! Doomed! Doomed!!! Was this review helpful to you? ( Report this ) 11 of 12 people found the following review helpful: Bad, but not fun in the way some bad films can be. , November 9, 2004 Reviewer: Christian Hokenson (Burbank, CA United States) - See all my reviews Folks, save yourselves from "House of the Dead." This is pretty atrocious filmmaking at its most insulting. Worse than even "Resident Evil." I know, I know... they are just videogames, not a movies (but if you check out the special features junk on the "House of the Dead" DVD you can find out the filmmakers had a much different, and much higher opinion of their effort). "House of the Dead" offers lots of action but, as usual for today's young auteurs weened on MTV, it's pretty damn hard to follow and, after a while, it becomes repetitious to the point of sheer boredom. The acting is rotten (save for Jurgen Prochnow (it's a long way from Das Boot, ain't it captain) and the ever weird, always interesting Clint Howard (it's a long way from "Evilspeak" isn't it Coopersmith)), the special effects are decent (when you can see them, and hey... ALL special effects should be decent nowadays, shouldn't they... no points there). The direction is nearly non-existent, and the screenwriting is simply bad... but not bad in a fun way-- the way you can play drinking games with a movie or MST3K it to death on a Friday night around the hookah. I can't even really bring myself to call this a horror film, for not once was I horrified save for the moment, toward the end, where I thought to myself, "y'know, you've actually wasted nearly two hours of your life on this inglorious piece of poop, man." This "film" has the temerity to namecheck George A. Romero and his (as one character aptly puts it) "Holy Trilogy" of zombie classics: "Night, Dawn and Day" natch. Well, 'tis true.. Romero is clearly sui generis when it comes to apocalyptic zombie horror. No need to run (as the current spate of zombies is wont to do), for there's nowhere to hide. Romero at the very, very least has an understanding of the basic rules of filmmaking that at least keep a viewer's interests alive for his dead folks... not only that, but he clearly understands the most basic rules of drama and character. I know many folks that didn't grow up with Romero's films might look at them with some derision regarding black n' white zombies in "Night of the Living Dead" or the baby-blue flesh and Crayola day-glow colors of blood from "Dawn of the Dead." Yet, Romero knew how to handle the gory violence in his films (over-the-top and with great shock-value) and, in the end, Romero wasn't simply striving for realism in gore so much as he was trying to make a valid (still valid!) point about how human beings act in a society under severe stress. He had something to SAY, and he was able to SHOW it without lots of lame-assed exposition that passes for dialogue these days. Uwe Boll on the other hand, knows at least how to load a camera and keep it running (and running and running and running). But he has no sense of story whatsoever, no sense of pace, no sense of continuity and no sense of fun. This is a dreary exercise in crap filmmaking with a decent-sized budget... the kind of budget Romero should have had for his underrated films, but hey! at least Romero knows how to use a dollar wisely. Boll seems to be a kid on the ultimate sugar high as he spends money on fancy camera angles, weird point-of-view shots, CGI gore, and buffed out stuntpeople as decayed corpses... and yes, I know this movie is really just a videogame. In fact, the "director" even goes so far as to include shots from that videogame as segues to his badly choreographed action sequences. After the first few heads a-poppin' (yay, for gun violence) it gets rather dull, and then the action speeds up even more in order to keep the audience awake and, well, just plain confused from what I could see. Boll hits all the cliches just right... POV of the bullet going into flesh and inanimate objects, bullet-time cinematography (can someone please put a stake in the heart of this visual stunt once and for all?!?) and of course some good-lookin' young adults with sawdust for brains and the martial arts skill of Bruce Lee flippin' the bird to the laws of physics. It's inane, it's astonishingly lame and it's insulting to sit through, and yet I did, just so you can avoid having to sit through it too! One thing about George A. Romero and his highly regarded trilogy of zombie films: the zombies themselves were often secondary to the living human characters they sought to munch on. They were scary because you could clearly see they were no longer reasonable human beings-- your family, your friends-- but just dead things with a devastating single-minded instinct for moving foward toward a hot lunch. It didn't matter if they ran or did Cirque d'Soleil-style acrobatics in order to get to you, or just simply lurched. The zombies were always a wave of nearly unstoppable slowness, and thus a very handy metaphor for everything from groupthink to mall shoppers on a Sunday afternoon. In "House of the Dead" the zombies are just fodder, nothing but magnets for lead projectiles... and yes, I know, it's just a videogame. In the end, avoid this load of manure and check out Romero's films if you haven't yet (and, really, what self-respecting zombie fan has not seen them yet?!?). If you can't handle character building, drama and a fairly amazing story of the breakdown of society due to lack of cooperation among the living (and, yes, plenty of gore), then I say turn to either "Re-Animator" or, better yet, "Return of the Living Dead" which at least also manages to tell a story and offer up some halfway decent acting with he gore. Both of those films also offer copious amounts of nudity for you teenage horror fans who seemingly can't get close to the real thing... and yes, I know the videogame movie does too, but the other movies have the added benefit of actual skilled filmmakers behind the scenes, while "House of the Dead" does not. "Return of the Living Dead" actually gives the horror fan a shining example of what "House of the Dead" could have been in the right hands. One film is loads of fun (and hey, by the way, Romero's films offer fun and humor in spades lest you think they are simply turgid sociological dissertations), and the other is so much less than fun it could lead to suicide. I know I wanted to off myself just for getting through to the credits. The films of Romero along with Peter Jackson's brilliant, low-budget "Braindead/Dead Alive," and the recent releases of "28 Days Later" (a quasi-zombiefest) and the hilarious (and quite bloody) "Shaun of the Dead" all offer far more entertainment value (key words here, folks) than "House of the Dead." These films all have some quirky things to say about life along with loads of furious bloodletting, while "House of the Dead" is simply a lot of sound and fury signifying nothing. Was this review helpful to you? ( Report this ) Customer Reviews Average Customer Review: Write an online review and share your thoughts with other customers. Give it a break! , December 28, 2005 Reviewer: Erick Irungaray "erickufo" (el paso, texas United States) - See all my reviews What do the people expect out of a movie that is based on a real shooting arcade game? We all know that lately, most of the horror movies suck now in these days, don't they?. Was this review helpful to you? ( Report this ) 1 of 1 people found the following review helpful: OMG , December 6, 2005 Reviewer: Jonas Brock (Tampa) - See all my reviews I expect horror movies to be somewhat bad or silly, but this was unreal. Avoid at all cost. Was this review helpful to you? ( Report this ) 1 of 1 people found the following review helpful: This is bad. , November 13, 2005 Reviewer: Kimberley Wilson (VA USA) - See all my reviews House of the Dead is based on a video game I had no expectations that it would be good but I was astonished at how bad it is. While watching it I kept thinking that it must be a parody. Surely Uwe Boll was joking when he did this, right? He's mocking bad horror movies, right? Wrong. I suspect that everybody who worked on this film was serious. This movie is so bad it's pathetic. It' likes watching Old Yeller get shot, seeing Litte Timmy drown in the well and finding out that the department store Santa is just a guy from Skid Row who was sobered up for the evening. I won't get into the plot becuase there aint any but there's a scene in it that's so dumb it haunts me and is a perfect example of the whole film. One of the "teens" (Why do teenagers in horror movies all look like they're on the wrong side of 30?) decides to fight the zombies with karate. Karate on the undead. Think about that. I don't care if you studied for five years under Pei Mei and David Carradine was your sensei, karate is not going to cut it when fighting zombies unless you're going to do the flying walk to safety thing. She gets eaten of course and one of her companions just stands there and looks. He has no reaction at all. The actor plays the scene like he's at the beach. Some bad horror movies are funny is a goofy sort of way. Others are mildly interesting because somebody at least tried to do something with them but this is just miserable. How this thing got to the theaters is some kind of mystery. Was this review helpful to you? ( Report this ) 5 of 5 people found the following review helpful: Holy crap, this movie is terrible , November 1, 2005 Reviewer: Michael J. Gold - See all my reviews I've seen some bad movies in my time, but man this one really takes the cake. I can't believe this garbage was put in theatres. The acting is hilarious. I love how there are zombies all over, and one guys girlfriend even turns into one and attacks him, then gets shot repeatedly. The boyfriend just kinda shrugs it off. No emotion at all. NOTHING Although my favorite part ever that me and my friend are now quoting non stop is the heartfelt scene where Curien is crying about how some lady died, he says (and i quote) She's dead, i didn't save her.. IT WAS MY FAULT... Were you here? did you see it? Did you see watch them rip her apart? SEE WATCH them rip her apart. I had to rewind to make sure i wasn't hearing things, then i put on the subtitles. Was that REALLY their best take? Man this movie is horrible and that's what makes it great. One of those corny ass flicks you can watch just to laugh at. Was this review helpful to you? ( Report this ) See all 287 customer reviews... Listmania! The Scariest and Coolest Moder... : by K. S Schneider The Good, The Bad, and The Ugl... : by Lunar Strain The worst Modern Horror Films : by Jason Voorhees "Jason V" So You'd Like to... Remember why they call film art : by Colin Nickell , Amateur Movie Critic Know How to Survive the Best Zombie Movies? : by hitlercosmetics , Zombie movie lover. watch the 100 worst movies of all time : by Joseph Dewey , a fan of really horrible movies Fun Facts from IMDb.com: Awards Click here to see more Awards Fangoria Chainsaw Awards: Chainsaw Award for Worst Film Leo Awards: Leo for Feature Length Drama: Best Make-up Trivia Click here to see more Trivia The movie is set before the events of the first House of the Dead video game. At the end of the film the survivors are rescued by a helicopter. As it is landing two men dressed in trench coats get of the helicopter. This is a reference to the original House of the Dead video game in which the protagonists are two special agents in over coats. Goofs Click here to see more Goofs In the laboratory, one of the supposedly gray, rotting, skeletal zombies lying on a table has a very visible pink, healthy nose sticking out of its skull. Crazy Credits Click here to see more Crazy Credits The opening credits play over video of the games, from both the arcade andDreamcast versions, begining with the famous "You must stop Curien!" scenefrom the game! Movie Connections Click here to see more Movie Connections Followed by: House of the Dead 2: Dead Aim Edited from: House of the Dead Quotes Click here to see more Quotes [pointing on a zombie in the water] Greg : Shoot it! Capt. Victor Kirk : What do you think I am trying to do, you f***ing moron? Rudy : You did all this to become immortal. Why? Castillo : To live forever! 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